Fear.
We talk about it quite a bit, don’t we, my friends?
We can be afraid of so much, and yet when we face it head on, we find it is often just smoke and mirrors, an itty-bitty Chihuahua whose bark is artificially amplified from behind the curtain.
Today I am sharing a story I wrote some time ago about facing a fear—being “bear-ly” fearless 
—that in retrospect and the light of day seems downright foolish.
But isn’t that so often the case?
Sometime during the night, something happened to the mechanical thingy that makes our water hot.
When we awoke, we only had cold water.
Good for drinking, not so good for showers.
Fortunately, we were living with my parents, helping them to take care of their property that is for sale.
What that means is that just across the driveway (we live in a separate building) is their home, inside this gigantic building that we used to run as a large, family friendly inn which could hold up to fifty people overnight.
As you can imagine, there was no shortage of showers. I figured I would just skip next door to take mine.
Skippity skip, just like Dorothy and friends down the yellow brick road.
Outside my door was a long driveway, surrounded by acres of God’s gorgeous countryside, which we share with his critters, including foxes, raccoons, and bears, none of which I could see out the window, because it was a pitch black 4:15am.
I stood at the ready in my pajamas, robe and my barefeet, holding a bowl full of shower supplies—yes, a bowl, and no, I don’t have a cute, nifty shower tote—with the key to the building and my cell phone in my pocket, and a big, heavy, metal weapon flashlight in my hand.
I told my dear hubbie goodbye as I bravely swung open the door.
Meanwhile, my inner scaredy cat was screaming “IS THIS THE LAST GOODBYE??!!, and I was tamping down the urge to go grab his hand and have him walk me to the front door of the inn (no, we don’t have guests anymore, but we still call the main building the inn).
But I am a grown up. So I knew I could do this adult thing and walk the million miles shortish distance by myself.
I stepped confidently off the porch, and swung the light around the yard, the barn and the driveway. The dumpster was just this side of the woods a ways off to my left, a favorite of the bears, so much so that we had to put a chain on the lid to keep them from opening it up.
My heart started to pound as I did double check.
Nope, no bears there.
Whew.
I was concerned they might misread the Life is Good logo on my pj’s as She Tastes Good.
Fighting the urge to run, I continued up the drive, figuring if I did I would trip on my robe, scattering shower goodies like so many potatoes and carrots around a tasty chicken.
The end of the building became visible, and then the granite steps to the walkway.
I swept them with light, not wanting to land a bare foot on one of the LARGE monsters toads that frequent this area.
Are you familiar with those amphibians whose body exudes an hallucinagen? My wild imagination saw me stepping on one, absorbing a mind-altering substance through my feet, and greeting the new day while dancing, navel gazing and holding an intense conversation with a door knob. ( Click here to share via Twitter if this makes you smile!)
Whew.
No critters.
Oh, but wait: I remembered there was more to fear!
Just a short distance from the door was a flower garden punctuated by a few decorative birdhouses screwed to the trunks of birch trees.
Well, they were decorative until a momma bird moved in and had her family there.
A couple of weeks ago Mr. Bear apparently decided he was not getting enough Vitamin B(ird) in his diet, and during a midnight visit he tore the house off it’s foundation.
Yup. Ripped it right off, screws and all.
Not a comforting thought as I stood there, quickly working the key in the lock.
I successfully opened the door and proceeded into the pitch black house, singing loudly to myself and anything/anyone there, down the multiple hallways and through various rooms to my destination, leaving a trail of lights blazing behind me, where I partook of the abundant hot water without incident.
I even made my way back across the driveway without encountering any of the dangers I had imagined.
Whew.
Fancy that.
Isn’t that more the rule than the exception in our lives?
While we spend so much time worrying and fretting and imagining the worst, very few of our dire expectations and predictions come to fruition.
Aren’t we better served by taking a deep breath and a step back, and putting our concerns into perspective, running them through our own “Fear-O-Matic 5000” to determine really, truly, if there are obstacles or dangers, and then creating a plan to deal with them, while remembering to lean on what matters most: our faith and families?
I think so.
Go on. Take that calculated risk and step out of your comfort zone.
Just remember if you step on a hallucinogenic toad and spend the night in your pj’s dancing with a bear and discussing the wonders of the universe with a doorknob instead of what you planned to do, at least you’ll have a great story to share.
Question: What fear have you faced that in retrospect was much smaller than you originally believed? Please share your thoughts in the comments, and we will see that we are not alone in having or working to overcome fears!
Sharing at NOBH, Happy Wives Club, Going Green with The Mommy Mess, Soli Deo Gloria, PYHO
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Such an excellent post in every way. I was on the edge of my seat reading your story and then so relieved when you successfully made it over to the inn! Like life really. -Ashley
thedoseofreality recently posted…Top 10 Ways We Waste 30 Minutes Every Day
Thanks for joining me on my “midnight” walk! Sometimes the wildlife here makes life quite interesting, especially when I think about the moose milling about the front yard, or the five deer in the driveway. . .
Twitter: fromtracie
says:
Whew! I’m glad you made it back home safely. You had me worried (although, I guess I KNEW you made it safely, since you were around to write this).
I let fear rule far too often. This is a timely read for me.
Tracie recently posted…Possibilities.
Ha ha, Tracie! Glad to provide you with a reminder to pull that curtain aside to see that what we fear is much smaller than we think.
Twitter: HappyWivesClub
says:
Every fear I’ve ever faced turned out much smaller in retrospect. What I’ve determined is as long as my fear doesn’t prevent me from walking through a door or operating in my gift, I’m okay with it hanging out (since it always seems to be around). It just isn’t allowed to impact what I do :).
Fawn Weaver recently posted…Marriage Mondays: Lean In {& Link Up}
Isn’t that the truth, Fawn?! Walk through the door, take a deep breath and tell fear to just go sit in the corner if it’s going to insist on hanging around.
Thanks for adding to the conversation!
Twitter: TheMommyMess
says:
Kim, you should just be my therapist, OK? I think I let fear hold me back too much.
adrienne recently posted…#GoingGreen-Recycle Your Best {Missed} Posts!
Hmmm, a pajama wearing, bowl-toting girl for your therapist. Now there’s a funny image, Adrienne! Let’s get our courage on and skippity skip forward!
This is such a classic story, Kim! It fully represents the Kim I’ve come to know and love! I’m so glad you survived that night. I’m also glad I survived a recent flight to Orlando. I hate planes, but this time was different. I was reminded that if my plane crashed, the quicker I’d be in the arms of Jesus. Not a bad option at all! It sure did bring me peace as we flew the “scary” skies.
Thanks for the smile, Beth. I laughed when I read the story represented the me you know. I had this flash of me, fast walking in my pj’s, clutching my shower goodies, headed to the inn. LOL.
Now there is a fresh perspective on flying. I hope anyone else who gets nervous flying takes courage and comfort from your words!
“While we spend so much time worrying and fretting and imagining the worst, very few of our dire expectations and predictions come to fruition.”
I am the absolute worst at this. And you’re right, very few of these crazy thoughts in my head ever happen. I’ve always got to refocus on the truth.
This was a great post!
Crazy thoughts. Boy, you pegged that, Justine. Looking back, especially over the years, I cringe at some of the steps I didn’t take forward because of fear. What a waste! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Twitter: TamaraCamPhoto
says:
I mean I knew you were going to be ok, because I read your blog, but it was a little scary! A lot scary. Last spring we had five bears in my garden. A mama and four babies. I do have a picture I can show you – maybe on twitter.
Tamara recently posted…Intersections.
Agreed-bears can be scary! My sister met a young one on our road years ago when she was jogging. She called my dad and asked what to to!
Oooh, do share that photo on Twitter. I’d love to see it! Four babies? Yikes!
Twitter: susanrstilwell
says:
Oh, Kim — I’m so glad there were no critters in the mood for a tasty Kim-treat! Gracious, the things that used to frighten me? I’m not typically a very fearful person, but pretty much anything NEW sets me back a step or two. Going to college, living alone, having a child, quitting work, empty nest… You name it, I’ve pondered it!
Susan Stilwell recently posted…A Monday Pause ~ Devoted to Prayer
Isn’t it funny what trips our fear trigger, Susan? I hear you on the being set back. I like to think I roll real easily with the punches but my hubbie gently tells me it just isn’t so.
I, too, am glad the bears didn’t want a tasty Kim-treat!
Enjoyed reading your story! I’m so glad it had a happy ending. I can be quite a scaredy cat myself so I relate to all your inner dialogue. Stepping out of my comfort zone isn’t easy, but it’s almost always rewarding, even when it isn’t as “successful” as I’d like. Thanks for the encouragement to be brave!
Lisa notes recently posted…What’s on your nightstand? – April ‘13
Thanks, Lisa. Goodness gracious, can you imagine if our inner dialogue became audible? What a cacophony it would be!
I have the silliest worries sometimes- the worst case scenerio. Thankfully, those rarely happen!
Shell recently posted…5 Easy Dinners for a Busy Week
Hooray for worst case scenario not coming to pass! Now we must make sure to not let it take root in our heads. Thanks for stopping by, Shell! >:-
Great story…and truly, every fear has been worse than the reality. Crazy vain imaginings…we allow our fears to right a story that is pretty much fiction. So glad the bear didn’t get you…My sister lives on a lake in NJ and there are bears who are very comfortable there. Scares the daylights out of me! Oh but it’s mostly my imagination…
Elise Daly Parker recently posted…I Got a Letter from God…
Reminds me of that childhood song, Elise: Lions and tigers and bears, oh, my!
Yes, crazy vain imaginings indeed. Hope the NJ bears give your sister a wide berth!
What a wonderful story! Glad there was a happy ending. Such truth…we spend so much time imagining the worst. Thanks for the smile and reminder tonight to not let fear hold you back. Blessings.
Beth recently posted…Win the souls of your children
Glad to provide a little entertainment, and a wry lesson as well. I laugh that I would do my best to teach my children to have courage, and yet too often I am less than brave. . .
Thanks for sharing, Beth!
Twitter: Soulstops
says:
Kim,
I need to rework my manifesto into something shorter and easier to digest….Thanks for your prayers and I will keep praying for you 
so happy you got your hot shower w/o meeting any monsters…your words are always encouraging and make me chuckle….and I used to be afraid of letting comments on my blog so I closed them, and when I opened them, I was pleasantly surprised
Dolly recently posted…On Trust, Trees, and Jeremiah
Me, too, Dolly, and I am sure my co-workers and family were grateful as well. I am so glad you opened your comments. It’s always nice to be able to encourage you as you encourage us!
I’ll keep praying for your writing, especially your manifesto! xo
Twitter: fiercedivablog
says:
I love this post and it feels so timely for me – and you are so right that most of our fears are nothing more than hallucinagens!
ilene recently posted…I Am Me
Isn’t it sad that fear is timely for us, Ilene! Here we are, Miss Too Darn Happy and Ms. Fierce Diva, and we are worried about figments of our imagination. . . Sigh…
Glad you stopped by! <3
Twitter: MommiFried
says:
What a great post! I have to say public speaking is the one fear that gets me every time. Once it’s over I sit there wondering what the noise was all about.
Crystal recently posted…The Role of Dad in the Modern Family
Thanks, Crystal. Public speaking really scares a lot of folks. I think it’s rated as more fear-inducing than dying in some top ten lists! I agree, though. Once you are done, you wonder what it was that scared you. . .
Twitter: chasingcloud9
says:
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve let my fear of something keep me from doing things….all my life! It’s always funny how I get myself so worked up about stuff and then when it actually happens it was never as bad as I pictured it being.
Stacey recently posted…Baby Fever: My Struggle With Postpartum Depression
If we can just keep that positive image in the forefront rather than letting our fears trample our resolve! I am seeing such a theme of this with all the comments here. Good luck to you in getting over getting worked up, and thanks for coming by to share!
I agree. So many of our fears will never happen. Best thing to do is confront them and get a nice hot shower.
Jamie recently posted…Gray and proud. Or was I?
You are so right. Many of our fears don’t happen, and stuff that is unexciting that happens is rarely foreseen. We are funny creatures, for sure!
I enjoyed reading this. We used to live in ‘bear country’, and I always had that fear of running into one in the back of my mind.
Patricia recently posted…The Spark
A legitimate fear, Patricia! I ran into one a few years ago in broad daylight, and ran screaming the other way. So dignified. . . Thanks for coming by.
I have taken some nighttime walks and can honestly say that I would have been singing out loud and left the lights blazing as well. Funny how fear sneaks up on us sometimes and makes things bigger and badder than they are.
Kim recently posted…The Cheerleader
You are so right, Kim. Fear does make things bigger and badder. I suddenly had a vision of a huge shadow cast from an itty bitty thing. I’ll have to keep that in mind next time I start to wind up. Thanks!